I love this chapter on Characters. Lamott connects it seamlessly to the preceding chapter by saying that characters develop just like polaroids, as you write your story, coming into focus the further you go.
That’s always been true for me. I love being surprised by my characters. Sometimes they don’t turn out to be anything like I first imagined they would be. As my story unwinds, my characters come to life.
Lamott says, “You are going to love some of your characters, because they are you or some facet of you, and you are going to hate some of your characters for the same reason.”
People always ask me which character I am in my novel, Girls’ Weekend. It’s a story of three moms who go away for a girls’ weekend and decide they can’t return to the lives they had been living. Each has their own reasons, their own demons and desires. My answer to this question, is always, “I’m all of them.” (Not that I’d ever cheat on my husband with a handsome singing Irishman. Probably.)
That’s because those women were sprung from my heart, where it was when I was in my late thirties. I was overwhelmed by motherhood, lonely staying at home, wondering if I’d regret the life I’d given up, and questioning whether I was bringing any value to the world. I was also frustrated with my circumstances, with a husband who worked too hard (instead of romancing me as he once did), and with my own ability to ask for what I wanted from him, my kids, and myself. I wished I didn’t obsess over appearances, worry over trivial things, or want more than I had.
I painted all of that into the three characters in my novel. In them, I could explore those aspects of myself. I could be them, if only on the page. I could imagine a different option.
My favorite Lamott quote doesn’t come from this book, but from an article or post or something I read later. I wish I could find the exact words.
Basically, she said, writing is composting.
We take every person we’ve ever observed at the DMV or dated briefly thirty years ago or climbed a tree with when we were eight, plus the crazy lady who rear-ended you, the waitresses, odd relatives, annoying coworkers, and every soul we’ve ever encountered.
To that we add our failed efforts, thwarted desires, biggest dream-come-trues, plus the pets we’ve loved and lost, the books we’ve read, the classes we’ve struggled through, conversations we’ve overheard, the places we’ve visited, and the movies we’ve loved (or hated).
All of that composts together to create your fertile mind. And from that fertile mind you spin stories and create characters and imagine worlds.
There is nothing new under the sun they say. And They are right. We are our own personalized AI experience. What comes out of us is an amalgamation of everything that went in.
The rest of the chapter delves into the advice all writers will give you — know thy characters. Inside and out. The good and the bad.
The story will come easily if you know what your character wants and why and how they ended up the person they are. You’ll know how they react to being stuck in traffic or stood up for a date. You know whether they snap their gum or pick their wedgie in public.
Lamott insists that the narrator has to be likeable. I agree with this, but I’m willing to bet there are lots of people who don’t. Personally, I really struggle to read a book if I don’t like the narrator.
“Having a likable narrator is like having a great friend whose company you love, whose mind you want to pick, whose running commentary totally holds your attention, who makes you laugh out loud, whose lines you always want to steal.”
But she also points out that they shouldn’t be too perfect. Perfect is boring; we all know that.
And here’s a great line that I don’t remember reading the first time I read this book:
“A writer paradoxically seeks the truth and tells lies every step of the way.”
That’s the basis of writing a novel. You’re making this stuff up, but you’re doing it to tell the truth. Love that.
The last lines of the chapter are so important and echo back to the start. We get to know our characters by writing them.
“Just don’t pretend you know more about your characters than they do, because you don’t. Stay open to them. It’s teatime and all the dolls are at the table. Listen. It’s that simple.”
What are your thoughts on characters? As a reader and as a writer. Do you have a favorite, most memorable one? The narrator in Wally Lamb’s, She’s Come Undone, is one who has stayed with me for decades now. Just that indomitable spirit when it doesn’t seem justified. Or Owen Meany. He was incredible.
The character in my latest novel is a young woman I absolutely love. Kat is a waitress with a word-a-day built vocabulary and three-legged dog for a best friend whose open heart is repeatedly crushed. So far, no takers. But even if the book never finds a publisher, I sure enjoyed getting to know Kat (and Gwen, the sensible shelter manager, and Dylan, the almost-lawyer with a heart of gold, and Johnny, the cook wannabe poet.)
Characters matter. We are all composting them every day.
I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Hey, thanks for reading. I know you’ve got lots of options, so thanks for sharing a few of your minutes with me.
Honored,
Cara
If you’re curious about what else I’m up to, check out my website, CaraWrites.com.
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If you’re a dog lover, check out my other blog, Another Good Dog. And if you want to know what is really happening in the animal shelters in this country, visit, Who Will Let the Dogs Out, and subscribe to the blog I write there.
I’d love to connect with you on Facebook, twitter, or Instagram, and I’m thrilled to get email from readers (and writers), you can reach me at carasueachterberg@gmail.com.
My latest novel, Blind Turn is a mother-daughter story of forgiveness in the aftermath of a fatal texting and driving accident. It won the Womens Fiction category of the American Writing Awards in 2022. Learn more about it and find out how to get your copy here.
My most recent memoir, 100 Dogs & Counting: One Woman, Ten Thousand Miles, and a Journey Into the Heart of Shelters and Rescues is available anywhere books are sold, but if you’d like some help finding it (or want to read some lovely reviews), click here.
My Life in Paragraphs 